Im back... After what seems like century away.

Hi guys.. im back. Surprise? im surprise by myself too. Ever since the last post.... The MTV of Ai Tai Tong, I've nv wanted to blog anymore. Lost all motivation of doing anything. Seriously.... tai tong ah... 7years of Love. She just disappear like tt... Just going thru the motion everyday... living like some zombie, anyhow spend money oso.. like.. so much money for what... buy flats, buy car, marriage and shits meh... Nah... not gonna happen... Since my last post. This period had been an upheaval in my life. Im like a totally changed person now. Grew up, yes. Stronger yes.. Just like what they say.. What doesnt kills you makes u stronger. Once u lost your world.. Losing anything else just doesnt matter tt much alr. COme to think of it. Just like what my bro says.... Even if she comes back. i have been free for so long... am i confident to go back to that Caged life again. Can i solve the long standing problem of no trust and her mother hates me problem.. i dunno... Since she seems to be happy with balenciagas, LVs and Chanel now. Perhaps, having more of them is her happiness. And me for one... cldnt give her lot of those. "Long champ is just our plastic bag" "you mean coach is branded" "do you know, i turn down a pilot's invitation to go on a yatch cos i got you anot" "do you even have the money to purchase a flat for our future, you are a guy u know.." " wheres tt diamond ring u promised me. say years alr, still dont haf" "Why you so useless.. cant get into my job.." Well... im inside now... Many think im mad. But... I got to go in. Maybe to chase her back? Cos i still do belive... just one look at each other... it will be the same old tears roll down, hug and all probs will be no prob again. or.. maybe... i sld immense myself in this huge eye opening industry and understand her leaving or maybe... be so distracted by everything tt goes on around me till i forget her existence... like she did.. But so long have pass... no matter is 2 weeks, 2 months, 3 months, we nv contact, she always remain the same old her.. but now.. its almost 9 months alr.. Are you still the same? i wonder.. im not the same anymore, is she the same... If we get back tgt, the things will be very different oso... Come to realise.. we can nv go back to the same old us anymore. Scariest thing in the world.. Time.. People often say in drama, they could exchange anything just for 1 sec with her/him. What is a few years.. What is a bright future or even pride. I will risk it all. I got to see her once again. to know for sure, are things still the same, or... how much have they changed. Are our last words like, "i'll nv marry any person till i die" and i'll nv have any Gf/Bf untill you did 1st. I haven... and i kept to my side of the bargain. i got to know u didnt or.. u actually did, in order to flip this Chapter of my life away. Well... Now that i see everyone in uniform everywhere.. and reminds me of you every sec.. it was heart aching for the 1st few days. but.. its getting use to it, feeling the stress at work, you once did. Rememebering the little details you told me and how u tell me bout each class after you finish. Making me, more interested in classes and all. Well, to rid of a phobia, you got to surround yourself with what you fear of rite.. Catching all the old dramas that you said its so nice. but i fail to catch any one of them too.. Its like reliving your life 2 years backwards once again... im tracing your foot steps now.. If 1 day.. you stop walking front and look back. Hopefully i've caught up with you... till then. *Pls just read and forget this emo post, in months to come, i promise interesting pics to many interesting places and make this an interesting blog. And pls... Dont speculate, ask me or comment on what job i am in now. i wont ans it. are not suppose to tell.. If i haf to tell u. i got to kill u. Thanks.