1 month into new job

1 month into my new job.. Everyday turn a corner, see someone likes u, just makes my heart skips a beat. Well.. now im ur junior, in ur same job. Sometimes.. i talk bout u. Sometimes i thought bout what you tell me bout everything tt im going thru now.. the place is near your house.. sometimes i drive by.. You are part of my life like tt..
But... When pple ask how long we broke up.. i realise.. what feels like a month is actually close to a year alr.. logically.. Cant be you lead a single, cut the world out life for this year.. though.. if you wan me to vote someone who do it.. my vote goes to u

When pple ask me... why dont u get a new girl. i will said i promise i will nv marry another girl and wont get a girl unless u alr move on and get a guy..
of cos.. the next question is... "so she got new bf alr?'
i dunno how to ans. i dont wanna find out.
New life.. keeping me so busy.. making me a student and feeling young again..
So many nice pple around me.
Friendly, pretty, caring...
Makes me feels like my Jc life, the time when i haven met you.
Can my life restart? hm... actually.. i know it can. But.. What we went through is so dramatic, what im ok to die for u. you ok to die for me.
Really think its not something i should put down.
haiz....
Emo strikes me at times.. when im less busy and all. At times having the feeling of being in a crowd. having friends everywhere. The niggling "alone" feeling that i cldnt rid of no matter im among how many friends or pple.
Ha! its weird.. Feeling like a 'Male widow' though.. u r alive and kicking...
Think cos step up and resident evil is out now... something u can watch over and over again. u die oso wont miss.. i wonder who will u be watching now. the stupid advertisements bout these movies just bring u back to my head.

OK!!! ENough of talking bout u..
Sorry readers... haha!~
recently i need to lose weight for my job! being tring hard. hope can bring back the old jia xi tt you all use to know.
haha! my friend was mentioning like nice jawline i use to haf..
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GZpshbvILxI&feature=relmfu

SEE! haha.. though if i slim back.. i will nv look like tt again. no more long hair aside.. i think i've aged quite a bit. old uncle now alr.

Almost a year alr.. how are u? i like so stuck now.. cannot step out and cannot stay on, knowing you are not there. Time will solve?? But we promise timeless love. what if its timelsss to u and im the only sensitive shit doubting all these.
Haiz~~~

Anyway! age oso good? Guess i dont look so play boy now?
and... My new job is like.. nest for playboys! haiz! heard things bout pple saying me playboyish....
sian... nothing new. Pls la! i heard tt all my life. since like sec sch.
ok la! i look like a playboy. bo bian what..
Bye bye! till i blog again :P

TT stunning day (but another long winded naggy post, suggest not to read it)

Well... for those of you who follow my twitter...
guess u know what happens..
i saw her.. on monday...
haiz... its like killing me man.
1st... i got to company. i greeted everyone good morning along the corridor.
it was crowded.. everyone along the way smile back or say morning back.. then i keep... Morning morning morning.. till 1 person just look down.
for an instance i tot it looks familiar, till like the next good morning then i realise.
OMFG its her.. i look back.. and saw tt all so familar back walking hastily away..
haiz.. i dont deny i join this company to see her again.
but when i did.. i didnt know it will turn out to be this way... i wanted to see her.. i wanted to talk to her.
i wanted to know if everything is still the same.
After we broke up, she said she couldnt keep in touch. she couldnt see me. cos the sight of me.. will make her nv ever leave me. but. why could she now just walked away like tt.
i didnt see her for the rest of the days alr. not at lunch not at tea break.
i texted her. saying if she wans to avoid me, i will leave the canteen... couldnt eat the whole day.
In a good way. i was little bit overweight my bmi by 0.6. so.. on monday.. 1kg was lost. thanks to her?
during afternoon class.. we went to a simulated place for some training matters. and i saw her.. walking alone to the toilet. she give the dunno how, straight face. didnt expect to see me there face.
i was staring at her.
i waited and did so much for this. how could i not rite..
i waited at the same place, and she walk right past me when she walk back.. with tt same face... i couldnt just walk up to talk to her as my trainer is talking... and she went to sit somewhere in her training place. i could see her here and there.
Her long hair is back! omg, how happy am i.. how i miss it. but the thought of my fingers not having the chance to run thru those hair, i wont get them on my shoulder and haf the smell of them...
it sucks...
I went back to class.. thinking i must talk to her..
i went to the corridor downstairs at bout 5.15 and waited till 5.40... i didnt see her..perhaps its no fate.. i cant keep my classmates waiting too...
its a disastrous day..
i felt like all i've done is all pointless. so what if i see her, so what i did everything..
We are strangers now...
i wonder if she got a new guy now..
she said she will nv haf a new guy unless i haf a new girl. and i did he same promise..
i even go a step further to promise i'll marry no one but her.. before she broke hers.. i wouldnt.
(pls dont tell me she got a new guy even if anyone of u knows bout it, despite i said this i really dun wanna know).
I went home.. and went to bed.. the whole day feeling the chest pain and irregular heart beat. i guess why pple keep saying its the heart tt love. guess it recognises her.. its like even ur mind is saying... forget it.. The heart doesnt. its not like emotional heartache or what.
its just like sharp pain like going thru heart attack or narrowing. and the irregular heartbeat.. i cant even control it. i got to take deep breath.
perhaps its despression? perhaps its no food? perhaps its no food + 2,3 cups of coffee? perhaps its just stress?
i dunno, medical stuff...

Today.. i went to class.. met a trainer who is a friend, who teaches a class next to hers.
he said how come see me listless yday.. and how is me and her.. cos.. he knows her too. Trained her before.
i told her we broke up since nov. Actually dont really haf an exact date.
But. the last time we behave like a couple, tts probably last year nov?
Cos i rem, she nv even wish me on my bday....
i told him i saw her yday.
He was like, 'no wonder..'He was asking me what happen and i told her some summary and im in here just to get her back.
i asked her like what class she attending and all.
HE told me it was a self directed course.
Means you got to volunteer and sign up.
Its a one day thing which explains why she not here today.
It was like a life saving NEWS!
she signed up for it? but she knew i was going to be here.
If she doesnt miss me or really wanna avoid me at all costs. Im sure she would cancel it? or not sign up for it?
she knew i was coming here like since MAY!
ok.. im always the happy-go-lucky one. telling pple to look on the bright side of stuff.
Im like the perfect white lie teller too! always..... saying lots to her.
i tink i can convince myself. tt must be the truth..

I think she misses me and really wanna take a look at me. or she just wanna dress nicely!~ come here let me see her and nv ever forget her. remember my promises and not be attracted by any nice girls around in the company?
hm...Either way, i think.. im still as impt to her, as she is to me..
She once told me, if im feeling it? she must be feeling it too.
ITs our time tgt. we spent it tgt. how can we feel differently? Right?
She even tell me before, she wont be with anyone.
If she wans a kid, she will get me to haf one with her. But doesnt mean she wants me.
She'll just haf a "mini me" to accompany her for the rest of her life.
Some of my friend say tts sick. Ha! but... i think i can understand..
I dunno what i sld do now, but i've decided.
I'll text her everyday, telling her what i did. despite there will always be no reply,
and just live my life normally.
i actually... am quite use to being single alr.

I knew im gonna miss out a lot of fantastic girls if im going to stick to my promise and carry on being emo and stuff... but.. There are some promises and pple, that you can nv put an end to...

Love you.. the one person who turn up in my life.

Changed me
Became my world
and is everthing i live for.

Wong Sin Yee..

Some Random overseas pics

Some random pic for the past year.

I've went to Malacca twice

Batam once

Bangkok for work twice

Bkk for Leisure and shopping once

Genting twice,

and port dickson once..

Just realised.. within a span of last dec to this july... i went so many places..

hm... nothing compare to voldemort

but.. im coming in and catching up alr.

now i cut short hair and become some weird person that i dont even recognise myself in the mirror.

The only decent pic i can find of myself.
This is still consider long.. i cut again alr.. slope the side and back. Fringe nv touch eye brown.
Looking like a total donk with a mushroom head.
hm... wouldnt dare to show here.

I'll blog again soon. hm...
when i tot of things to?
Sld not be too long.
Thanks for all your patience..
and tt 2 sisters..
Thanks... u all surprised me :)

Ps: My ex will from this post on be refer to as voldermort.

cos.. she shall be the one that sldnt be name. hearing bout her just..... u know..

Im back... After what seems like century away.

Hi guys.. im back. Surprise? im surprise by myself too. Ever since the last post.... The MTV of Ai Tai Tong, I've nv wanted to blog anymore. Lost all motivation of doing anything. Seriously.... tai tong ah... 7years of Love. She just disappear like tt... Just going thru the motion everyday... living like some zombie, anyhow spend money oso.. like.. so much money for what... buy flats, buy car, marriage and shits meh... Nah... not gonna happen... Since my last post. This period had been an upheaval in my life. Im like a totally changed person now. Grew up, yes. Stronger yes.. Just like what they say.. What doesnt kills you makes u stronger. Once u lost your world.. Losing anything else just doesnt matter tt much alr. COme to think of it. Just like what my bro says.... Even if she comes back. i have been free for so long... am i confident to go back to that Caged life again. Can i solve the long standing problem of no trust and her mother hates me problem.. i dunno... Since she seems to be happy with balenciagas, LVs and Chanel now. Perhaps, having more of them is her happiness. And me for one... cldnt give her lot of those. "Long champ is just our plastic bag" "you mean coach is branded" "do you know, i turn down a pilot's invitation to go on a yatch cos i got you anot" "do you even have the money to purchase a flat for our future, you are a guy u know.." " wheres tt diamond ring u promised me. say years alr, still dont haf" "Why you so useless.. cant get into my job.." Well... im inside now... Many think im mad. But... I got to go in. Maybe to chase her back? Cos i still do belive... just one look at each other... it will be the same old tears roll down, hug and all probs will be no prob again. or.. maybe... i sld immense myself in this huge eye opening industry and understand her leaving or maybe... be so distracted by everything tt goes on around me till i forget her existence... like she did.. But so long have pass... no matter is 2 weeks, 2 months, 3 months, we nv contact, she always remain the same old her.. but now.. its almost 9 months alr.. Are you still the same? i wonder.. im not the same anymore, is she the same... If we get back tgt, the things will be very different oso... Come to realise.. we can nv go back to the same old us anymore. Scariest thing in the world.. Time.. People often say in drama, they could exchange anything just for 1 sec with her/him. What is a few years.. What is a bright future or even pride. I will risk it all. I got to see her once again. to know for sure, are things still the same, or... how much have they changed. Are our last words like, "i'll nv marry any person till i die" and i'll nv have any Gf/Bf untill you did 1st. I haven... and i kept to my side of the bargain. i got to know u didnt or.. u actually did, in order to flip this Chapter of my life away. Well... Now that i see everyone in uniform everywhere.. and reminds me of you every sec.. it was heart aching for the 1st few days. but.. its getting use to it, feeling the stress at work, you once did. Rememebering the little details you told me and how u tell me bout each class after you finish. Making me, more interested in classes and all. Well, to rid of a phobia, you got to surround yourself with what you fear of rite.. Catching all the old dramas that you said its so nice. but i fail to catch any one of them too.. Its like reliving your life 2 years backwards once again... im tracing your foot steps now.. If 1 day.. you stop walking front and look back. Hopefully i've caught up with you... till then. *Pls just read and forget this emo post, in months to come, i promise interesting pics to many interesting places and make this an interesting blog. And pls... Dont speculate, ask me or comment on what job i am in now. i wont ans it. are not suppose to tell.. If i haf to tell u. i got to kill u. Thanks.

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Updates!

Recently haf been at home alot. cos, i haf changed my insurance job to part time, if you all are interested, still can find me for your insurance matter. but.. im quite sian of pple's perspective of the job alr. i oso not those irritating insurance pple. go ask pple buy one. haa! do the job, so i can carry on acting. but tink, all these star dream sld come to an end alr. i oso old alr. must start to be responsible alr. now trying to find a job. perhaps related to my engineering degree one. but must oso be bit flexible for me to carry on the insurance job. hee... since insurance change to part time alr. i'm like loving my life. very relax. and go office only when i got things to do. if not, then dont need. haa!! Dont need to do those sian cold calls and stuff. only do when pple call me up to do for them. hee.. prob is.. earning very little only. well~ lets just enjoy life b4 i start a mundane working life i will say. haha!!! so.. my rabbit benefit the most! i got time to bring it for walks all that. hee! some pictures! SEe how happy and curious looking he is!~